


Space

by space_ally



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bullying, Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Kid Viktor, M/M, Naive Viktor, Other, Poetry, Poor Viktor, Pre-Canon, Prose Poem, Tears, Vitya, mean kids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 15:12:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9078226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_ally/pseuds/space_ally
Summary: A short poetry-like thingy about Viktor's past. It hurts though. "Smaller, make yourself smaller, Vitya."





	

**Author's Note:**

> I had about 4 hours of sleep don't judge me. Or do. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

"Smaller, make yourself smaller, Vitya."

It was a joke, right? Those kids who pushed him in this tiny locker. 

They were going to come back, right? They would all laugh about it, right?

Viktor already laughed, he laughed and laughed but it sounded like crying.

So small, so tight, his breathing got funny. It was hysterical wasn't it? They weren't bad people, Viktor knew. They were going to get him out of there.

They would notice he was skipping classes. They would. 

"11 hours trapped in a locker", his favorite teacher was so so shocked but Viktor smiled and breathed and felt like curling himself into a ball. 

It's fine though it's always fine. Big boys don't cry, skaters don't cry.

Viktor always slept curled into the tiniest corner in his bed, maybe he was secretly a cat? But he liked dogs better and when Makkachin slept next to him it wasn't weird to make himself look smaller. 

A new school, another locker but Viktor was getting taller. No, they would hate this, smaller Vitya, make yourself small!

It fit.

He didn't mean to cry, they would get him out, right? They shouldn't see him crying then because they were his friends and he promised to stay silent but Viktor felt a little dizzy and couldn't stop coughing. 

They were so mad when they found out he lost conscience, they thought maybe he died and Viktor was so sorry, so so sorry but they stopped paying attention to him. He had messed this up and he didn't make friends and it was his fault so maybe he should prove to them that he was a great friend but how? He was bendable, he was a skater, maybe they-

Viktor was too tall for the lockers now but there were other places for being trapped and he made himself look smaller, so so small and he kept close to the walls and people thought he was weird and maybe he was.

"Straighten your back!", Yakov demanded harshly and Viktor did because this was skating, he was a skater and he was ought to behave like that. And he was fucking graceful but the first time he had to walk around, head held high he thought he was going to die.

Long silver locks hid his face and he was so tense and his breathing was funny again so maybe he should laugh or maybe he shouldn't but the others laughed at him so it was okay he guessed? He still slept close to the wall, curled into a ball, hiding his face. 

"Keep your posture!", Yakov demanded again and Viktor did but it felt like drowning the next day when he had to keep it up at school. And he wore his hair up too and they all looked at him and he locked himself in the bathroom and cried until there were no tears left. 

"Good job, Vitya", Yakov grunted and Viktor broke down on the ice and Yakov was so confused and lost because Viktor was strong, wasn't he? Right, he was strong, his father always forced him to act like that but Viktor always made himself smaller when he talked because his father was stronger than him and it hurt less when he was curled up in a ball, close to a wall amd covering his face with his arms. 

They went to cut his hair and Viktor jumped at the reflection often, more often than he should have but he also paid attention to the mirrors and maybe he was pretty. A little at least. And skating became his biggest talent and once, Yakov let him drink Vodka for his birthday and Yakov was so drunk and he squeezed Viktor shoulder and he said: "You're pretty alright, kid" and Viktor had smiled and he would not disappoint Yakov because he was probably the only friend he had except for his dog.

Viktor still slept curled into a ball and Makkachin had grown closer over the years and the bed didn't feel as big when she was around and sometimes Viktor hid his face in the brown fur and imagined being a skater at the Grand Prix. He fell asleep with a smile on his face.

Rink mates were pretty okay. They always promised to meet again but they never did but they weren't mean also and maybe Viktor lost his naivety a few years ago so he smiled at them and made empty promises himself but he felt so lonely because he couldn't tell Yakov about his feelings, because they were professionals now and Makkachin did listen but she never answered. But it was okay and Viktor wouldn't complain and no one knew how he curled into a ball in the shower as well and he laughed but it sounded like crying.

Yuuri was so pretty and he took up a lot of space and he was perfection and he was so drunk and he was so close to Viktor, his heart missed a beat and when he went to bed after the banquet, Viktor took up a little more space on the bed because he got lost in his thoughts over Yuuri Katsuki. 

Yuuri liked this, being close, touching, right? Right? He was supposed to look at him like he did at the banquet but he was so distant. 

"Smaller, Vitya, make yourself smaller", the silver haired mumbled and hugged his legs with his arms, staring at the waves of the sea. And it was too big and he was so small and maybe he would get lost, swallowed by the ocean and drown, drown, drown. 

But Yuuri's hugs pulled him back to the surface and kept him warm and close and safe. And Yuuri's lips fit on his so perfectly and Yuuri's hands fit into his just right and when they came back from the competition, they pushed the beds together and Yuuri saw Viktor curling up inside a ball and he caressed his cheeks and whispered sweet things to him and they fell asleep in each other's arms and when they got up Yuuri complained about Viktor taking up so much space but he didn't mean it like that and he laughed and Viktor laughed and this time, it didn't sound like crying.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are always appreciated!


End file.
